Male Abuse Awareness Week

There is a cultural bias which maintains that males cannot be victims. Males are expected to be confident, knowledgeable, and aggressive. When boys are victimized, they tend to be blamed more for their abuse and are viewed as less in need of care and support, than girls who are abused.

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Types of male abuse, facts and statistics

– At least 41 percent of the victims of domestic violence are men. (Harvey P. Forehand)
– As many as 1 in 5 males will be sexually abused before the age of 18. And one in five of adult rape victims are male. (Federal Bureau of Investigation in the US, or FBI)
– One in six men will be a victim of domestic abuse in their lifetime. (The British Crime Survey 2006/07 figures)
– Same-sex batterers use forms of abuse similar to those of heterosexual batterers. They have an additional weapon in the threat of “outing” their partner to family, friends, employers or community. (Lundy, Abuse That Dare Not Speak Its Name: Assisting Victims of Lesbian and Gay Domestic Violence in Massachusetts, 28 New Eng. L. Rev. 273 (Winter 1993)
– women who abuse men tend to prefer forms of abuse that don’t involve physical violence. The hurt, the injury caused by the habitual use of vicious mockery, frequent emotional blackmail, spreading odious lies and so on aren’t visible. (Harvey P. Forehand)
– Male Sexual Harassment in the Work Place on the Rise; According to a report by the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission there were a record amount of harassment complaints filed by men in 2006. The figures given in the report state that of the 12,025 sexual harassment claims made in 2006 15.4 percent of these claims came from men. This shows a significant increase of male harassment cases made in the last ten years of 4.5. ([link])
– Munchausen by Proxy is when someone is causing illness or injury in another to obtain attention; usually by a parent or caregiver against a child (in 85% of cases the child is male) ([link])

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Useful websites and books

Why men do not disclose – [link]
ManKind (chariity supporting male victims of abuse) – [link]
M-Power – [link]

Abused Boys: The Neglected Victims of Sexual Abuse – by Mic Hunter
Victims No Longer: Men Recovering from Incest and Other Sexual Child Abuse – by Mike Lew
The House On Telegraph Hill (An Asylum): Growing Up with Abusive Parents and a Lifetime After – by Charles S. Wilson

Abusive Porn

Child Pornography:

Child pornography refers to images or films (also known as child abuse images) and in some cases writings depicting sexually explicit activities involving a child; as such, child pornography is a record of child sexual abuse. Abuse of the child occurs during the sexual acts which are recorded in the production of child pornography, and the effects of the abuse on the child (and continuing into maturity) are compounded by the wide distribution and lasting availability of photographs of the abuse.
Children of all ages, including infants, are abused in the production of pornography. The United States Department of Justice estimates that pornographers have recorded the abuse of more than one million children in the United States alone

Rape Pornography:

Rape pornography is a genre of pornography involving the depiction of rape.
It was announced on August 30, 2006 that possession of depictions of rape would become a criminal offence in England and Wales. However, the resultant law on “extreme pornography” did not explicitly specify depictions of rape. In September 2008, it was announced that Scotland planned to criminalise possession of “extreme” pornography, extending the list of banned material beyond that in England and Wales to include depictions of rape, and “other non-consensual penetrative sexual activity, whether violent or otherwise.

Extreme Pornography:

Extreme porn depicts acts of incest, beatiality, violence and other illegal or abusive acts. Often the filming/photographing of this involves the forcing of people to commit these acts under threats of violence or other acts of cohersion

Vaginismus

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Vaginismus is a sexual disorder that is characterized by the outer third of the vaginal muscles tightening, often painfully. A woman with vaginismus does not willfully or intentionally contract her vaginal muscles. However, when the vagina is going to be penetrated, the muscles tighten spontaneously due to psychological or other reasons.

Vaginismus can occur under different circumstances. It can begin the first time vaginal penetration is attempted. This is known as “lifelong vaginismus.” Alternately, vaginismus can begin after a period of normal sexual functioning. This is known as “acquired-type vaginismus”. For some women, vaginal tightening occurs in all situations where vaginal penetration is attempted (generalised type). For other women, it occurs in only one or a few situations, such as during a gynecological examination at the doctor’s office, or with a specific sex partner.

Causes

There are many possible causes of vaginismus. One example is an upbringing in which sex was considered wrong or sinful—as in the case of some strict religious backgrounds. This is common among women with this disorder. Concern that penetration is going to be painful, such as during a first sexual experience, is another possible cause. It is also thought that women who feel threatened or powerless in their relationship may subconsciously use this tightening of the vaginal muscles as a defense or silent objection to the relationship. A traumatic childhood experience, such as sexual molestation, is thought to be a possible cause of vaginismus and acquired-type vaginismus is often the result of sexual assault or rape.

Symptoms

Vaginismus can occur when any kind of penetration of the vagina is attempted. This includes attempted penetration by a penis, speculum, tampon, or other objects. The outer third of the vaginal muscles contract severely. This either prevents penetration completely, or makes it difficult and painful. The woman may truly believe that she wants to have sexual intercourse or allow the penetration, but that her subconscious desires or decisions do not allow her to relax the vaginal muscles.

Treatment – Psychotherapy

There are three settings in which psychological treatment can occur. These are in individual, couple, or group settings. During individual therapy, the treatment focuses on identifying and resolving any underlying psychological problems that could be causing the disorder. Problems stemming from issues such as childhood trauma or rape are often resolved this way. Revealing insecurities or fears about sex resulting from such things as parents’ attitudes about it, or a religious upbringing, can often be discussed successfully if the affected woman can trust her therapist.

Couples therapy is often used as treatment for sexual disorders, the idea behind couples therapy is that any sexual problem should be treated as a problem for the couple as a whole, and not just addressed as a problem for one person. Because this view is taken, the therapist interacts with the patients both separately and as a couple. The therapist addresses both the couple’s sexual history and any other problems that may be occurring in the relationship. Confronting these problems may help to resolve the cause of the vaginismus. Working with a therapist on relationship problems can be very effective— perhaps especially so if the vaginismus is caused by a subconscious use of vaginal muscle spasms as a nonverbal form of protest about one or more aspects of the relationship. The couple is educated about vaginismus disorder and given advice on the kind of activities that can be engaged in at home that may be helpful in overcoming the disorder.

Group therapy, which can be very effective, is another form of therapy for vaginismus. In this form of therapy, couples or individuals who have the same or similar sexual disorders are brought together. For people who are embarrassed or ashamed of their disorder, this setting can provide comfort and strength. It is often very beneficial to witness another person discussing sex and sexual problems in an open and honest forum. It can also help to inspire patients to become more open and honest themselves

Abuse affects all dimensions of human development and existence

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Physical and neurobiological

In addition to such direct results of trauma as broken bones or ruptured internal organs, physically abused children often display retarded physical growth and poor coordination. Malnutrition may slow the development of the brain as well as produce such dietary deficiency diseases as rickets. In both children and adults, repeated trauma produces changes in the neurochemistry of the brain that affect memory formation. Instead of memories being formed in the normal way, which allows them to be modified by later experiences and integrated into the person’s ongoing life, traumatic memories are stored as chaotic fragments of emotion and sensation that are sealed off from ordinary consciousness. These traumatic memories may then erupt from time to time in the form of flashbacks.

Cognitive and emotional

Abused children develop distorted patterns of cognition (knowing) because they are stressed emotionally by abuse. As adults, they may suffer from cognitive distortions that make it hard for them to distinguish between normal occurrences and abnormal ones, or between important matters and relatively trivial ones. They often misinterpret other people’s behavior and refuse to trust them. Emotional distortions include such patterns as being unable to handle strong feelings, or being unusually tolerant of behavior from others that most people would protest.

Social and educational

The cognitive and emotional aftereffects of abuse have a powerful impact on adult educational, social, and occupational functioning. Children who are abused are often in physical and emotional pain at school; they cannot concentrate on schoolwork, and consequently fall behind in their grades. They often find it hard to make or keep friends, and may be victimized by bullies or become bullies themselves. In adult life, abuse survivors are at risk of repeating childhood patterns through forming relationships with abusive spouses, employers, or professionals. Even though a survivor may consciously want to avoid re-abuse, the individual is often unconsciously attracted to people who remind him or her of the family of origin. Abused adults are also likely to fail to complete their education, or they accept employment that is significantly below their actual level of abilit.

Male rape and sexual abuse

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What is male sexual assault?
Male sexual assault is when you have been forced to take part in any sexual act with another man or woman which you did not willingly consent to. Even if you did not resist or fight back at the time of the attack, it is still assault.

Who can it happen to?
Quite simply, anyone. It could have happened to you whilst you were a child or a teenager, or as an adult. It is not a ‘gay crime’ – it happens to more straight men than gay men.

Who are the perpetrators?
Again, it could be anyone – male or female. But the facts show that more men were abused from within the family than outside, and more men were raped by people they knew rather than strangers.

How common is it?
It’s much more common than most people think. Research statistics tell us that almost 3% of men reported a non-consensual sexual experience as adults and over 5% of men reported sexual abuse as a child.

Is it a crime?
In England there were changes to the 1956 Sexual Offences act in 1994 which made the rape of a man an equal crime to rape of a woman. Further updates to the Sexual Offences act in 2004 mean that the different types of sexual assault that men can experiences have been defined.

What kind of effects can male survivors experience?
It varies from individual to individual, but common effects include; feelings of isolation, depression, anger, anxiety, issues about sexuality and gender, substance abuse, self-harm, eating disorders, negative body image, fears about abusing, hyperconsciousness of body and appearance,  PTSD/C-PTSD and DID.

Who else is affected?
The psychological and mental health issues which survivors often experience, can also lead to real problems with relationships. So anyone who shares his life, be it partner, friend or family, can be affected.

Why is male rape and sexual abuse such a taboo subject?
Firstly, few people even realise that male rape exists. So a man who is trying to come to terms with sexual assault can feel like there is nowhere to turn. But secondly, society itself places certain expectations on men – they are supposed to be “strong” and “able to take care of themselves”. This only heightens the sense of confusion and self-doubt felt by survivors of male rape and sexual abuse; many of them end up blaming themselves.

Why do so many men suffer in silence?
Because of our society’s taboo about male rape and sexual assault it is rare that a victim will go to the police or seek immediate help – on the contrary, he will often be as desperate to keep it a secret as his attacker is. As well as the trauma and feelings of shame, many of our clients face the difficulties of people’s attitudes to male rape and abuse.

For more information on male rape see here

Child on child sexual abuse

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Child-on-child sexual abuse refers to a form of child sexual abuse in which a prepubescent child is sexually abused by one or more other children or adolescent youths, and in which no adult is directly involved. The term describes sexual activity between children that occurs without consent, without equality, or as a result of coercion. This includes when one of the children uses physical force, threats, trickery or emotional manipulation to elicit cooperation. Child-on-child sexual abuse is further differentiated from normative sexual play or anatomical curiosity and exploration (i.e. “playing doctor”) because of overt and deliberate actions directed at sexual stimulation or orgasm. In many instances, the initiator exploits the other child’s naïveté, and the victim is unaware of the nature of what is happening to them. When sexual abuse is perpetrated by one sibling upon another, it is known as “inter-sibling abuse”

The incidence of child-on-child sexual abuse is not known with any certainty, similar to abuse by adults. It frequently goes unreported because it is not widely known of in the public, and often occurs outside of adults’ supervision. Even if known by adults, it is sometimes dismissed as harmless by those who do not understand the implications. In particular, inter-sibling abuse is under-reported relative to the reporting rates for parent-child sexual abuse, and disclosure of the incest by the victim during childhood is rare.

Sometimes this abuse is performed by children who have been sexually abused, either by family members or by adults or older children. Sometimes children who have experienced these things react by coaxing, manipulating, or forcing younger children into the same kind of sexual behaviour. Brothers and sisters may become the victims of this ‘second hand’ abuse. Sexually intrusive children who act out their own abuse in this way are sometimes called ‘sexually reactive’, sometmes this is a form of abuse reënactment to make their own experiance seem more “normal” or to give them a sense of power that was lost during their own abuse.

Child on child sexual abuse is a misuse of power and authority. Older children who sexually abuse their younger brothers and sisters frequently abuse them in other ways as well. Persistent putting down, teasing, or belittling younger children about their size, gender or other personal characteristics is called emotional abuse. Scaring younger children in dark rooms, telling them that no one loves them, or that terrible things are going to happen to them are also examples of emotional abuse. Much of the hitting, pinching and smothering of younger children is dismissed by bigger or older siblings who tell their parents, ‘We were only having fun’ or ‘We were just wrestling.’ However, this isn’t ‘just fun’ if it’s forced on the younger child; it is actually physical abuse.

Warning signs

Normal behaviour-

• Rubs genitals before falling asleep
• Explores differences between boys and girls
• Is interested in watching adults go to the bathroom
• Plays “doctor” with other children
• Plays “house”. Plays ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’ roles

Behaviours that should cause concern-

• Frequently rubs genitals instead of playing
• Keeps asking questions about sex even after questions have been reasonably answered
• Persists in watching adults in the bathroom
• Forces other children to play “doctor “
• Pretends to have intercourse

Suggested reading:

Wiehe, Vernon. Sibling Abuse: Hidden Physical, Emotional and Sexual Abuse (2nd ed). Thousand Oaks: Sage Publications, 1997.

Examples

Three young boys, ages 8 and 9, accused of raping 11-year-old girl

Three boys, 8 and 9, charged with raping 11-year-old girl

When men are the victims of rape

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It is impossible to estimate how many men are raped each year. Whereas 60% of women never report being raped the number of men who don’t report it is likely to be far higher, because they do not want to admit to the humiliation and degradation and do not want to have their sexuality and muscularity questioned. The problem has been ignored for decades, in part for this reason.

Men raped by men:

Many people assume incorrectly that the only males who are raped are children, or that male rape only occurs in prisons and between homosexuals. While it is true that many male victims of rape are young, the age range is as great as that of female victims, ranging from a few months to over 90 years of age. The primary difference seems to be the number of assailants and the degree of force used.
Male rape victims are often attacked by groups of men and usually sustain more physical trauma that female victims. Those victims who come to the attention of the authorities, however, may be a highly select group, since the physical trauma may be what precipitates their coming forward.
Male rape is more common in settings where women are absent, such as prisons. As with female victims, rapists attack men in an attempt to assert dominance and control.
Male survivors face many of the same problems that female survivors face. Like female survivors, males often are not believed or they are accused of being homosexuals who were “asking for it”. An article published in the southwestern medical journal in 1980 adviced physicians when examining a male rape survivor to “maintain a high level of suspicion, since in some cases the “victim” may have an ulterior motive in reporting the alleged attack. Even in the case of a child, the story may be fabricated in a bid for attention.”
One of the most devastating issue that a male survivor faces is having his masculinity and sexuality questioned by others. Many men protect theirselves from feeling vulnerable by beleieving that only gay men are raped, and so logically the survivor must “really be gay” and “must have wanted it”.

Men raped by women:

The belief that men cannot respond sexually against their will is incorrect. In reality male sexual responses can occur in a variety of emotional states, including anger and fear. For more information on this see here
In reported cases of woman on man rape men have been forced by a single woman or a group of women to participate in sexual activity, including intercourse under threat of physical violence. The men often reported being physical restrained, fearing not only for their general safety but also for their lives.
These men, just as anyone who is raped, suffer great emotional trauma, which often lasts for years after the event. Men raped by women are also more likely to hide the event out of fear of disbelief or ridicule, which often aggravates the emotional distress. The most immediate impact is a feel of disgrace and humiliation that makes them feel “less of a man”.
While they usually come to the attention of therapists when seeking help for sexual dysfunction, the men often do not associate the sexual issues with the rape. Once in treatment they may be involved with a therapist for years before divulging the assault.

Another major issue for men who responded sexually during an assault is that they later feel abnormal – that any “normal” man would have not responded. This adds to their feelings of inadequacy and may make them question their own sexuality or gender preferences. This is especially problematic in cases of teenage boys being assaulted by men.

Although men are often seen as the aggressors in reality they can be just as vulnerable and as traumatised as women, being victimised in the same way and succumbing to the same fears and trauma. Though the gender roles and expectations that society holds can often make the aftermath of a rape even more destructive to a man than it is to a woman.

Adverse Childhood Experiences

The  adverse childhood experiences study population included 9,367 (54%) women and 7,970 (46%) men (total sample=17,337). Their mean age was 56 years. Seventy-five percent were white, 39% were college graduates, 36% had some college education, and 18% were high school graduates. Only 7% had not graduated from high school.1,13
The Study assessed 10 categories of stressful or traumatic childhood experiences (seen below). The experiences chosen for study were based upon prior research that has shown them to have significant adverse health or social implications, and for which efforts in the public and private sector exist to reduce the frequency and consequences of their occurrence.
Prior research into the effects of childhood maltreatment and related experiences (including witnessing domestic violence) has tended to focus on only one or two categories of experience, such as physical or sexual abuse or domestic violence, and has generally focused on a limited range of outcomes. The ACE Study is unique not only because of its size, but because it was also designed to assess the relationships of a broad range of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) to a wide range of health and social consequences.

• Childhood abuse

-Emotional

-Physical

-Sexual

• Neglect

-Emotional

-Physical

• Growing up in a seriously dysfunctional household as evidenced by:

-Witnessing domestic violence

-Alcohol or other substance abuse in the home

– Mentally ill or suicidal household members

– Parental marital discord (as evidenced by separation or divorce)

– Crime in the home (as evidenced by having a household member imprisoned)

The first important conclusion to be drawn is that adverse childhood experiences are very common. Moreover, ACE Study estimates of the prevalence of childhood exposures to physical and sexual abuse are similar to population-based surveys. A national telephone survey of adults conducted by Finkelhor et al. used similar criteria for childhood sexual abuse and determined that 16% of men and 27% of women had been sexually abused; in the ACE Study cohort 16% of men and 25% of women in our sample had experienced contact childhood sexual abuse. In our study, 30% of the men had been physically abused as boys; this closely parallels the 31% prevalence recently found in a similarly structured population-based study of Canadian men. The similarity of the estimates from the ACE Study to those of population-based studies suggests that findings would be applicable in other settings.

The other findings from this study are detailed below:

The effects of ACEs are long-term, powerful, cumulative, and likely to be invisible to health care providers, educators, social service organizations, and policy makers because the linkage between cause and effect is concealed by time, the inability to “see” the process of neurodevelopment, and because effects of the original traumatic insults may not become manifest until much later in life. When a child is wounded, the pain and negative long-term effects reverberate as an echo of the lives of people they grew up with—and then they grow up, at risk for taking on the same characteristics and behaviors—thereby sustaining the cycle of abuse, neglect, violence and substance abuse, and mental illness.

References
Anda RF, Felitti VJ, Walker J, Whitfield, CL, Bremner JD, Perry BD, Dube SR, Giles WH. The Enduring Effects of Abuse and Related Adverse Experiences in Childhood: A Convergence of Evidence from Neurobiology and Epidemiology. European Archives of Psychiatry and Clinical Neurosciences, 2006; 256(3):174-86
Dube SR, Miller JW, Brown DW, Giles WH, Felitti VJ, Dong M, Anda RF. Adverse Childhood Experiences and the Association with Ever Using Alcohol and Initiating Alcohol Use During Adolescence. . Journal of Adolescent Health, 2006;38(4):444.e1-444.e10.
Anda, RF, Felitti, VJ, Brown, DW, Chapman, D, Dong, M, Dube, SR, Edwards, VJ, Giles, WH. (2006) Insights Into Intimate Partner Violence From the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study. In PR Salber and E Taliaferro, eds. The Physician’s Guide to Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse, Volcano, CA: Volcano Press; 2006.

Effects of childhood abuse

The effects as an adult can be severe and take years to work through. Often survivors spend years in therapy to overcome the effects of their childhood abuse that has crippled them from functioning normally as adults (Wiehe, 1997). Poor self esteem is a common effect. As children, victims of sibling sexual abuse tend to feel worthless, unwanted, inferior, unloved, and inadequate.

These feelings of worthlessness are often associated with guilt and shame which frequently leads to self-blame for the abuse. These kinds of symptoms can affect a person’s psychological development. Survivors can become overly sensitive to comments or criticism. Even looking for hidden negative meanings in positive messages.

Difficulty with interpersonal relationships and relationships with the gender of the offender are common problems of adult survivors of sibling sexual abuse. (Wiehe, 1997) Survivors tend to be suspicious and untrusting of others. They find it hard to become close to someone and trust them and often have problems controlling anger. Often survivors repeat the victim role in other relationships and enter into abusive relationships with both friends and romantic partners. Even as adults it can be difficult to view negative relationships as abusive because they tend to normalise

their abuse. Survivors can also have the opposite reaction and transfer their emotions about their experience of abuse to the offending gender in general. For example, they may feel fearful or hateful towards all men because the abuse was perpetrated by a brother who is also a man.

Self-blame and guilt are common emotions connected to sibling sexual abuse. The survivor feels that they had somehow allowed themselves to be abused and feel shameful and guilty for not being able to prevent the abuse from occurring. Often survivors blame themselves into adulthood.

These feelings can be made worse if during disclosure, a victim is blamed or not believed. (Wiehe)

Survivors often have extreme anger about the abuse which can be expressed in angry outbursts, anger at men, or anger provoked by various situations. Most survivors have to continually work towards controlling their anger especially when it is being directed inappropriately. Anger at their siblings or other family members can make it difficult to maintain relationships with the family of origin. (Wiehe, 1997) This can be very difficult for a survivor who may experience feelings of grief and loss due to the changes in the relationships in the family.

Sexual dysfunction is a common effect of sexual abuse. Survivors tend towards two paths; avoidance of all sexual contact or sexual compulsiveness or promiscuity. (Wiehe) Even though it is not as common, some victims of sexual abuse can act out and abuse others. This is called “repetition compulsion” and is an attempt for the victim to take him or herself out of the victim role and into a new role where he/she is no longer powerless. Boys who have been molested tend to repeat the abuse as girls tend to repeat the abuse as victims. Girls do not assume the role of sexual aggressor as often as boys but research shows that those who do usually have a background of lengthy and extreme abuse. The more common reaction of sexual compulsiveness or promiscuity could be viewed as an unconscious effort to overcome or deny their feelings of powerlessness, shame, and anger. Abuse contains elements of distrust, secrecy, danger, and physical or emotional abuse which is often recreated in the survivors’ promiscuous encounters in adulthood. It can also be seen as a confusion of boundaries between affection, sex, and abuse. It happens as a result of the developmentally inappropriate and personally dysfunctional ways a child’s sexuality was shaped. (Wiehe, 1997)

Some survivors also react by turning to drugs, alcohol, or eating disorders. These are used as coping mechanisms and eating disorders stem for a need to have control.

The emotional or psychological problems most commonly associated with sexual abuse are depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Depression can be evident in a child shortly after the initial incidence of abuse. The severity of the abuse is NOT correlated with the intensity of depression. Incidents of depression as adults are high. According a survey by Vernon Wiehe, 26% of survivors experienced depression that required hospitalization and 68% had attempted suicide, with 50% of those having more than one attempt. Anger and depression are often seen together. Depression can be defined as anger turned on oneself. PTSD is associated with symptoms of depression, general anxiety, anxiety attacks, and flashbacks. These symptoms can be triggered by events that remind them of abuse such as sexual activity or being alone at night or when in the presence of the perpetrator. Because survivors tend to push abuse out of their memory, repress, disassociate, or block-out memories, PTSD is an anxiety disorder which the survivor re-experiences the abuse. This can be a full flashback, or an emotional or physical memory or it may even be re-experienced in dreams (Wiehe, 1997).

Post-traumatic Stress Disorder can appear in children shortly after abuse or many years later as adults. PTSD is an anxiety disorder that can occur after someone has been through a traumatic event. SECASA defines PTSD as having the following criteria:

1. The person has experienced an event that is outside the range of usual human experience and that would be markedly distressing to almost anyone.

2. The re-experiencing of the trauma in at least one of the following ways:

a. Recurrent and intrusive recollections of the event.

b. Recurrent distressing dreams of the event.

c. Sudden acting or feeling as if the event were recurring.

d. Intense psychological distress at exposure to events that symbolise or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event.

3. A numbing of responsiveness or reduced involvement in the external world some time after the trauma, indicated by;

a. Diminished interest in activities and/or

b.Feelings of detachment or estrangement from others and/or

c. Constricted affect; unable to have loving feelings or to feel anger

4. In addition, at least two of the following symptoms must be present

a. Hyper-alertness or being easily startled.

b. Sleep problems.

c. Guilt about surviving or behavior required to survive.

d. Problems with memory or concentration.

e. Avoidance of activities that arouse recollection.

f. Intensification of symptoms if events symbolize or resemble the traumatic event.

The national center of PTSD states that symptoms of PTSD can be terrifying and can disrupt one’s daily life. PTSD symptoms usually start soon after the traumatic event, but they may not happen until months or even years later. They may also come and go over a period of many years. Many people who develop PTSD get better over time but some (about 1 out of 3) may continue to have symptoms and need to seek treatment to better cope. There are four symptoms of PTSD; reliving

the event, avoidance, numbing, and feeling “keyed up” or hyperarousal. People  experiencing PTSD may also have problems with drinking or drugs, feelings of hopelessness, shame, or despair, employment and/or relationship problems (including violence and divorce), and physical symptoms. Treatment for PTSD is available including cognitive-behavioral therapy, EMDR (eye movement desensitization and repressing), medication such as SSRI (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor)

Major depressive disorder, commonly known as depression, is another common psychological effect of sexual abuse. This can be in combination with PTSD or other emotional disorders.

Depression can severely disrupt one’s life, affecting your appetite, sleep, work, and relationships.

Symptoms of depression include;

• Constant feelings of sadness, irritability, or tension
• Decreased interest or pleasure in usual activities or hobbies
• Loss of energy, feeling tired despite lack of activity
• A change in appetite, with significant weight loss or gain
• A change in sleeping patterns, such as difficulty sleeping, early morning awakening, or sleeping too much.
• Restlessness or feeling slowed down
• Decreased ability to make decisions or concentrate
• Feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, or guilt
• Thoughts of suicide

What causes Abuse?

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The causes of interpersonal abuse are complex and overlapping. However, the following are widely regarded to be some of the most important factors:

• Early learning experiences: This factor is sometimes described as the “life cycle” of abuse. Many abusive parents were themselves abused as children and have learned to see hurtful behavior as normal childrearing. At the other end of the life cycle, some adults who abuse their elderly parent are paying back the parent for abusing them in their early years.
• Ignorance of developmental timetables: Some parents have unrealistic expectations of children in terms of the appropriate age for toilet training, feeding themselves, and similar milestones, and attack their children for not meeting these expectations.
• Economic stress: Many caregivers cannot afford part-time day care for children or dependent elderly parents, which would relieve some of their emotional strain. Even middle-class families can be financially stressed if they find themselves responsible for the costs of caring for elderly parents before their own children are financially independent.
• Lack of social support or social resources: Caregivers who have the support of an extended family, religious group, or close friends and neighbors are less likely to lose their self-control under stress.
• Substance abuse: Alcohol and mood-altering drugs do not cause abuse directly, but they weaken or remove a person’s inhibitions against violence toward others. In addition, the cost of a drug habit often gives a substance addict another reason for resenting the needs of the dependent person. A majority of workplace bullies are substance addicts.
• Mental disorders: Depression, personality disorders, dissociative disorders, and anxiety disorders can all affect parents’ ability to care for their children appropriately. A small percentage of abusive parents or spouses are psychotic.
• Belief systems: Many men still think that they have a “right” to a relationship with a woman; and many people regard parents’ rights over children as absolute.
• The role of bystanders: Research in the social sciences has shown that one factor that encourages abusers to continue their hurtful behavior is discovering that people who know about or suspect the abuse are reluctant to get involved. In most cases, bystanders are afraid of possible physical, social, or legal consequences for reporting abuse. The result, however, is that many abusers come to see themselves as invulnerable.